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  • Krishna Chaitanya M

The Last Adieu : Pain of Love

I saw her eyes. They were wet. And I can see my reflecting in her eyes. I was smiling in her eyes (though I was not) and I was handsome there, than I was in front of her. She loved me more than I deserved…and in return I hurt her more than I should (only harm she did was to love me…more than herself). When she was a dream…I wished that she would be real and now when she is real I’m praying that she should be a fable.

I want to say ADIEU. But my lips were trembling, my hands were quivering, my heart was shrinking, my soul was cringing. It seems something was struck in my throat and words are resisting themselves to come out and transform into an agony.

When I was alone…the thought of her presence animated my world and now when I have everything I need, the thought of her absence darkened my life. I lost my shadow in that darkness. It swallowed everything around me. It was like a moonless night in a thick forest. It altered itself into venom and crept in to my veins. I can feel it. This grudge travelled across my spine and struck right in the heart, awaking the torture and that reminded me…that I too had a HEART.

My body is wincing. It is paining, paining……and paining. It is like my little heart is holding the ocean of pain. It is aching more than I can hold…and more than I can bear. This twinge is tearing me apart. I want to cry and relieve the agony, but my tears were dried up much before. I lost them too. Oh GOD…Is this your way of telling me that death sometimes is an adorable gift. I wish I could die, but I can not. The thought of her memories living alone in this world without me, didn’t allow me to die. Nothing stood there except for a tower, lamp post and me….all existing, but lifeless. I thought I can get away…now I am sure I can’t, for the fact I still love her. I stood there arrested by fate…watching her fade away with time. Though my life left me, I am still surviving. Pain of love is inevitable. Now hoping my past was a fable, but in vain.

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