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  • Writer's pictureKrishna Chaitanya M

November Love

Prelude:

This is a typical routine love story of a boy who fell in love with a girl (he calls her SOMEONE!). It’s no different from others.

There isn’t much to say about this story…

She was his crush

He fell in LOVE.

It was his Life.

He was honest.

But it became a memory.

And that Memory is his story.

Vamsi came to Mumbai to attend the induction training for the company he joined recently, along with his other new colleagues. On the Very first day, Vamsi falls in love with SOMEONE. What happens in Mumbai in that 3 days is the story…


Part 1: My Last Crush

I find myself enthralled by colours. However, it is when I chance upon a girl adorned in a dress that complements her smile that I fully grasp the depths of my fascination with hues. That particular Tuesday, the bewitching colour was Orange.

Fate led me to HER, within the confines of a company guest house, where she resided as my friend Anu's roommate. The introduction that followed was casual, leaving neither of us invested in the encounter.

In the days that ensued, I discovered that she hailed from the same state as me. Yet, I chose to overlook this detail, fearing the turbulence that loves and crushes had ushered into my life before. Nevertheless, destiny had other plans, and I found myself unable to deny the budding emotions within me.

The following day, during our office training session, I saw SOMEONE alongside Anu.

Finally, I accepted the truth; I had developed a crush on her. However, I resolved that this would be my final crush (I am serious, don’t laugh at me).

A heart not easily understood, mine succumbed to the charm of a girl in a white dress, especially one who wielded her smile so effortlessly. Now, I can’t believe myself…as I find myself hopelessly in love once more (this time, I cannot help myself…She is wearing white!). As if the strings of a hundred guitars and violins played in unison, my heart danced to a symphony of emotions, ignited solely by her presence in that dress.

As I began to like her, a series of disappointments followed me (which, was obvious!). The first among them was that she was assigned to a different training batch.

Anticipating a break, I waited impatiently for what felt like a hundred years (or, as mere minutes would have it, 30 minutes) so I could catch a glimpse of her. Alas, when I finally stepped outside, she seemed to be everywhere - collecting printouts, typing on her laptop and even playfully toying with a rose. Everywhere I see I see her only. Only her! When they said love is blind…I thought getting blind from each other. But for me, it turned out getting blind from the world around you.

On another occasion, I found myself standing on a bustling sidewalk near our office. It was a sunny November day, with people rushing past each other as if life were propelled in fast-forward, except her. She walked in slow motion, or so it seemed to me. While the rest of the world appeared dull and monochrome, She is so colourful and gorgeous. Was she now my life's beacon? I wondered, grappling with my emotions.


Part 2: My First Try

Later that evening, I awaited Anu in a coffee shop, only to be surprised by SOMEONE's presence alongside her (please, don’t inquire about the colour of her dress this time...I cannot recall anything but her smile!). My relentless pursuit to find a reason to talk with her continued, but alas, both reasons and words failed me.

How I wish I can be the director of my own love story and the writer of the entire script between us.

This moment demands a language of its own. A language only my eyes can speak, and only hers can understand. How effortless it would be to communicate without uttering a word, and have feelings be conveyed through the gentlest of glances. If only eyes could speak. If only!

After that wordless evening with SOMEONE, the three of us returned to our guest house, conversing until 11 pm, with my role mainly that of an attentive listener. Fate seemed to intervene, leaving Anu occupied with a phone call and leaving both of us alone.

Then, as if guided by fate's hand, a miracle unfurled. She initiated a conversation with me in my native tongue, and our exchange continued until 1 am. Her charm was undeniable, and her voice, was a melody of sweetness, as she shared nearly everything about herself (well, almost everything). In the course of our conversation, I gathered the courage to ask if we could go for a walk. Secretly, I hoped she would resist, for if she agreed to walk with me, I knew I would be beyond saving - lost in love for her, more than I loved myself.


Part3: One Fine Day

As we walked together, with each step, my emotions vacillated. At times, I felt nothing, my mind a blank canvas. But with each successive step, I felt everything, my heart weighed down by emotions.

Time seemed to dissolve, melting away like ice in the warmth of her smile.

Though I had seen countless beautiful places and encountered many wondrous things, nothing compared to her eyes and the way she looked at me, with a half-smile in the corner of her eyes. God! I would willingly surrender all for that moment. And I say it with utmost sincerity. I wish for that moment to endure forever.

It was then that I realized - I could fall in love with the same girl multiple times, in multiple places, and multiple ways (Do not ask me how - for in love, anything is possible!).

The following day, I found myself in the cafeteria, and as our eyes met, I smiled - she smiled in return. I waved my hand - and she waved back.

In my longing, I dared to believe she felt the same (a fallacy known to every boy!). Later, in the evening, I texted her and then kept staring at the mobile screen for her reply. In an act of hopeful persistence, I messaged her once more, hoping she had missed it the first time, but left with disappointment.

The next day, destiny led us together again, and she graced me with a smile. But before I could utter a word, she drifted away. She behaved strangely for reasons unknown. She tried to ignore me. Perhaps, we were mere colleagues, and she sought to maintain normalcy as if nothing stirred within her.

Anu, the bearer of whispered secrets, intimated that SOMEONE had sensed my feelings, an inference drawn from her demeanour. Anu inquired, "Why do you love her?" And truth be told, I had no words to articulate. All I know is I love her. I love her more than I know how much I love her. I love more than she can imagine.


On our final day, she bid goodbye to Anu and then came near me, expressing that she enjoyed my company and asked me to keep in touch. She is being unfair to me for being so sweet when I know she doesn’t have any special feelings for me.


<< My love for her is like November rains, when you start enjoying the most – it stops! >>


Nevertheless, I decided to take my chance (If not now – then when?). I mustered the courage to ask if I could call her after the training. She lowered her gaze, her words hesitant, as I inquired about her feelings towards me. She responded, "After this training, we shall part ways, but let us remain good FRIENDS" (a coded denial). As she moved one step closer to me, I took one step away from my dream.

She is my dream girl. I thought she never existed. If she existed, I thought I could never come across her. Fortunately, I found her. Unfortunately, she will not be mine.

She said goodbye. I didn’t bid goodbye….I chose something easier: to wait, to wait for some miracle to happen again.

She came as a rising sun into my heart and left as a setting sun. I lived a LIFE between dawn and dusk. She left me, leading the rest of my life into the darkness of the night. And her memory is the moon I can cherish in that darkness. I have a day to be forgotten and the rest of the story to be left unsaid.

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